Bozeman sucks. It’s horrible. It was a terrible place to grow up and I don’t know why anyone would ever want to live there.
I’m kidding, of course. Bozeman is an incredible town and I’m so thankful to have grown up in such a wonderful place.
What does suck, though, is that everyone else is discovering how awesome Bozeman is. It keeps making national lists of “most livable cities” and other such things, and as a result it’s growing so fast. And the worst part is that people come to Bozeman because they love its small-town feel, but they bring their big city attitudes with them.
Us Bozeman natives are not amused.
(And for all the Big Bang Theory fans out there… despite what Sheldon may say, we do not call ourselves Bozites)
So I’m going to start telling everyone that Bozeman is a terrible place. Maybe it will deter them from visiting or moving there.
In the summer of 2015, Pat visited Bozeman the first time, meaning I got to be a tourist in my own back yard, which is always kind of fun. So allow me to recap our adventures and provide some examples of how dull and ugly and awful Bozeman is.
1. Museum of the Rockies
Arguably one of the best museums in the area, the Museum of the Rockies is home to one of the most extensive and complete dinosaur collections in the world! The head paleontologist and curator was actually a consultant for the Jurassic Park movies; he’s very well known in his field. But there’s so much more than just dinosaurs. There are permanent exhibits on geology, Native Americans, Yellowstone National Park, and Montana history, as well as a fairly large planetarium. The Museum also brings in some impressive traveling exhibits. Over the years, we’ve learned about King Tut, chocolate, and Pompeii, just to name a few!
2. Downtown
Believe it or not, I don’t have any of my own photos of downtown Bozeman because I don’t actually spend much time there. There’s one coffee shop – Wild Joes – that I frequented when I still lived at home, but that’s about it. The downtown area is largely geared towards tourists, with lots of gift shops, but there are also many restaurants and locally-owned boutiques. Quite a bit of money has been put into sprucing up the downtown area in recent years and they’ve done a very nice job
3. Hyalite Canyon
I’ve written a few posts about this already (read them here), but I can’t talk about Bozeman without mentioning the fact that the entrance to Hyalite Canyon is just 15 minutes away
4. The M
I’ve written about this previously as well – the giant Montana State University “M” on the mountainside east of town. It’s one of the most popular and iconic hikes in the area and provides a spectacular view of the Gallatin Valley
5. Bridger Mountains
The “M” is located on the southern slope of Mount Baldy, one of the most massive mountains in this fairly massive sub-range of the Rocky Mountains. The Bridgers form the eastern edge of the Gallatin Valley and provide many recreational opportunities. We took Pat for a drive around to the back side of the range for some up-close views of these beautiful mountains. (Photos of my previous hikes up into the Bridgers can be seen here and here)
6. Beer
As with most areas these days, the craft beer scene has really heated up in Bozeman in recent years. Since I don’t live there anymore, I’m way out of the loop on the current breweries. But when Pat and I visited, we treated ourselves to some post-hike beer samplers, buffalo pepperoni pizza, and a view at Bridger Brewing
7. Sunsets
My mom lives on the western edge of town, with a largely uninterrupted view of the mountains, meaning we can watch the sunset paint streaks of color across the wide-open Montana skies every single night. I don’t think I need any words for this one. I’ll let the photos do the talking
So you agree with me, right? Bozeman looks pretty blah.
Definitely not a place worth visiting.
Handstands Around the World 
Ha, I have never thought of visiting Bozeman but I’m actually heading through Montana later this year so I might give it a shot! We have the same problem, albeit on a much smaller scale, with people coming to the island I grew up on for a nice life of isolation, only for them to moan that it’s not like the city they came from. Well no shit. lol
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I suppose things like this are an inevitable fact of life, but very annoying for sure. If you need any Montana recs, let me know 🙂
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Totally Agree! Terrible place, never come…..JK but not really. I grew up in and around Bozeman and now go to MSU….so yeah. It’s totally turned into the big city vibe with all the (un)welcome out of staters who LOVE our ‘hospitality’ and “kindness”. Livingston is slowly turning the same way….why did I have to live in a tourist town?!! Nice article, btw! ❤
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Thanks!
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Bozeman is one of my favorite places. I have spent over a dozens weeks there over about a dozen trips, both in the winter in the summer, I have a few things to add; Great skiing a short drive away; blue ribbon trout streams; Food! many small unique restaurants and cafes;
I agree with Diana, you probably don’t want to visit because, I like short lift lines, good fishing and no waiting lists for my favorite cafe.
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Good additions, thanks! As I don’t do a lot of skiing or any fishing, I didn’t think to include those on the list. And since I don’t live there anymore I’m really out of date on all the restaurants.
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During my travels I have met several people who live in Bozeman and they all rave about it (sorry, the word is definitely out). This terrible place looks like one I’d love!
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Yeah, unfortunately well kept secrets have a way of spreading rapidly. I’m sure you guys would love it there, so much outdoorsy stuff to do!
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I’ve never been there, but my sister and her husband have. They loved it. So when I read your opening sentence, I was kind of surprised, but then, of course, you were kidding. 🙂 It’s a beautiful area.
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It really is. I was fortunate to grow up there. Thanks for reading!
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Looks absolutely terrible. I don’t know why on earth anyone would want to go there (starts to map a route to Bozeman).
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Ahahaha well if you do make it there I can certainly send you some recommendations and info 😊
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Well I’m not saying that I could be there in under four days. And I’m certainly not saying that we make one big trip out west every year. But if you happen to throw some recommendations my way I know they won’t go to waste 😉
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Looks terrible. We’ve been through the area a few times and sadly have yet to stop and give the city it’s due. We built with the Habitat affiliate in 2016 but they were doing construction in West Yellowstone so again, a fail.
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Well if you ever make it back I hope you have a chance to spend a couple days in Bozeman. I know you guys would enjoy the hikes and the scenery and I’m sure Abby would find a ton of doggy friends on the trails.
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Thank you, I hope so too! We’re missing the west this summer!
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Looks like you’re seeing a lot of beautiful stuff out east though 🙂
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